Saturday 5 March 2011

Purr-ess Intrusion at my Blog Launch

Papurrazzi tried to get me.

Pub to purr in one easy move

Well, I don't know what is the matter with her.

Something to do with, and I quote, "Loss of local amenities kills all community spirit. It's here in black and white. No pub, no village website, nothing. Asset stripping by non-residents should be forbidden. Big Society, my a*&^."

Some villages in Norfolk apparently whose pubs have been closed by the same person who owns the pub here. And he lives in some godforsaken place called "The Sarf".

And she's found it on t'interweb. This Google thing should be banned after 6pm IMnotsoHO, thank you.

Not sure what a pub is but the lack of one in the village has definitely caused grief in this household. Why is Lindsey *always* here when I need to sit on the keyboard quietly during the evenings and wash?

Well, she's here. I'll sit anyway.

The keyboard iz mine


Today appears to be a difficult day for Lindsey. Firstly, Cumbria County Council appear to have put out an update to the plans for the BDUK pilot (she talks about this far too much) which seems to have caused minor apoplexy, bad words, and striking of the keyboard. And then there's something about State Aid guidelines being ignored, and the failure of this country to get true broadband, all of which are causing a run on these mugs of tea she keeps littering my desk with.

As you can see, I have taken up residence in front of her to chill her out. When I sit down, (which I am about to in the photo) something really quite trffic happens. I have written a poem. Iz can multitazk.


(With apologies to Pooh)

On the left of the keyboard
Is a key where I sit
There isn't any other key
Quite like it
It's not at the bottom
It's not at the top
And it's puurfect as it makes the PC stop

Cable Tied



I have insisted that Lindsey makes space for me on the desk. Apparently, playing around with the cables stresses her out and causes a very interesting reaction. Something about "Arg! You've disconnected the entire network". I shall bear this in mind for future.

I have co-authored a book



The latest community broadband book is finished and on sale. I contributed a substantial amount in the authoring and editing process, of which I am very purroud.


Here I am dictating another chapter to Lindsey:


Introduction

I am a rescue cat from Wing and a Prayer, originally called Mrs Mog, but now re-named to match my new station in life - Cat5. I am a broadband cat.

I am currently re-organising the home I now live in, and those who live here, to my requirements. Most of the time, it is just myself and my comfort requisitions officer, Lindsey. She still needs some work, but I think she has potential.

She says I have to mention Graham Small, whose fault, apparently all this is. Thank you Graham for giving me a voice on t'interweb. It's been a long time coming and shows how well Lindsey is taking to the training.